About Me

Shocher Adam, in Hebrew, means “Seeking Man” or “Searching Man.” I started this blog when I realized that a) I was going to convert to Reform Judaism, and b) there aren’t nearly enough resources out there for people who are converting, especially for those of us who are gay or bi, poly, in an interfaith relationship, or otherwise different from the ger that most conversion blogs are aimed at: heterosexual, vanilla, monogamous and planning on getting married and having lots of kids.

Let’s just say that I’m not that person.

I have two kids. They’re nearly adults, they live with my first ex-spouse, and I would not push them at this time in their lives to accept any faith beyond the one they grew up with. I’m also in my 40s and I’m not interested in having any more children beyond these two. If, someday, either or both of them decides to convert, I’ll support them – but I’m not going to push them.

I’m also a married man. My husband finished his conversion on October 1st, and we will renew our marriage vows in good time, after conversations with our Rabbi and picking an appropriate date. He was not planning to convert (and see above what I said about my kids and conversion – that goes double for him) but in fall of 2014, around the time we got married, he announced his intent to convert as well. It’s complicated, but we make it work.

My best friend is a Jewish woman who has been central to my understanding of what Judaism is. She was a witness to my mikveh, a supporter at my beit din, and has been a continual source of strength and support for me as I’ve gone through the process of becoming Jewish.

Apart from providing a resource for people like me, who don’t fit the standard mold, I started this blog because I’ve been searching for G-d for a long, long time and until I found Judaism, I hadn’t found any answers that seemed to be meaningful or help me when the going got tough. In Judaism, I seem to be finding those answers.

Officially, I finished my conversion to Judaism on the 27th of August, 2015, or the 12th of Elul, 5775, if you want to be technical about it. But the end of the conversion process is only the beginning of a life in Judaism. It’s a milestone, not an endpoint.

There are many other things about me that may or may not be relevant at this time: I’m a social scientist and I teach college; I work in a lower-class poverty-stricken area, so I don’t make a whole lot of money; I love the Renaissance Faire. In my copious spare time, I sing, I do various creative work, and I write. But the main point of this blog, at least as I start it, is my journey and my search for a religious path, and my journey along the path of the religion that called me to itself and made me its own.